When I was in college, I had one of the worst grades of my life. I had a 7.0 average in high school, which is very average for a male. However, I didn’t know how to be an adult. I couldn’t read or write like a normal adult, and I was so bad at math that I barely graduated with a 4.0 average.
This is what lead to my not graduating high school. I didnt have a career. I didnt take care of myself. I had no friends or social life. I was so socially inept that I only knew people who had a better than average job and were not so socially inept. I was a bad fuck and I got lucky with the people around me. I was just awful to them.
I’ve always hated high school social skills. The whole idea of coming to a school with only a few hundred people (mostly people from the same neighborhood) made me feel like a freak. So I have very few friends today. I know this is a small sample size, but I have the feeling that high school was just a huge waste of time for me.
I started high school in the fall and in the first week or two of school I was already in a weird phase where I felt like I was on some kind of high-level social medicated, neurotic mission to avoid having to talk to people. In the first few weeks of school, I had a hard time talking to anyone, and I was more than likely going to avoid school altogether.
I had a very bad summer that included a lot of school-related activities, but the worst thing was having to write my senior year papers. Writing papers is like the worst job ever, because you constantly have to think about the next syllable to write, and you have to do it in a way that makes it look effortless and smooth. When you get to the point where your writing is so boring that it takes effort to read it, you are done for.
I’ve had the same situation and I would be less inclined to write the same thing about my senior year or a couple of years later. My writing has become boring. It’s only after the last few months of my life that I’ve had so much time to work on my thesis that I can’t actually write anything. But I’m not going to risk it all.
I have been known to hate it when I write as well as what my writing looks like. Because when I go to my library and read something, it just feels like I’re reading something. Not to mention I have a ton of friends that are trying to write a better or more interesting book, so the fact that they are trying to write something that looks like a better or more interesting book means that I look like someone who is trying to read something in a better way.
But it can be hard to do. You can get frustrated with yourself, and it can be hard to figure out how to make things better.
In a way it’s a bad habit to take the time to really think about what you want to say, but it means your mind is actually very creative. Being able to think about what you want to say can be really cool.
